got moodswing today.
thats what fatin thinks about me.
its true i think? but i dun show any grudge towards anyone..
did i?? well, sorry if i did.

i dunnoe whats wrong with me actually.
but what i know is got to do with me and the surroundings around me.
i was being 'emo' today man. and i hate that.
but i just cant seem to smile.

and yes, i've been giving fake smiling eversince they tried to cheer me up.
but thx wonders and also to my lovely 4/3 classmates as they got 'worried' about me. thanks top bobby to tho kinda cheer me up. haha. but mostly, thanks to my 7wonders. who did cheer me up but i still give fake smile.

well, honestly, its about everything (besides my friends). is about my studies and my family. i dunnoe. i just start to hate study and thinks that study is just a watse of time. whats more when everyone around me are so much better then me in education.

i just sux at it.

and im still thinking whether should i continue to go up to sec5 to take O's or just finish N'level and go ITE? i mean. ITE is not that bad anymore. i just wana stop studying and pursue in what i love most and thats ARTs. WHATEVER it is as long got to do with ARTS.

i know my parents wont allowed me to do that. they want me to take O's and if i were to take O's also cause to make them proud and make ayu's parent's look up at me.

but to think of it. what for if i work for something i dont like and was force to do so. then rather i work for something i like and enjoy dong it. like haiiz... sec5 is so useless.

should i give up? or should i just continue and force myself do the things that i dont like. but.. im gonna miss my friends. they are the ones to support me. thanks you guys. i love 4/3'o8(;

well. i will just see how it goes. maybe discuss this with my parents? but they will gona blast and keep comparing me with other of her friend's son/daughter that so better then me. which like i dun care even thought it hurts me.

haiz. i just see how it goes lah. =(

well. thats all readers.
and sorry to be 'emo' today. and i know its not for me.
i must be the HAPPY dude always. but i've been faking all this while. sorry guys! =x

but im not faking when i said i love my friends. (=

signing off..
razz(:
if i die, please visit me...